i can feel it.
the time is soon.
im sure my friends will be glad when it happens. woo.
no point rushing it.
just let it come. (how ironic)
dont think too soon humans.
im available for questioning.
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Days
hello everyone. its been some days since my last entry.
anyways,
yesterday, i met ying hui.
for those of you who have been following my blog, you may remember ying hui in one of my past month post. i think.
well, as predicted by fukun and me, his problems with his gf has come, and on the dot, after a month.
so he came to me to tell me his problem. even though i probrably couldnt help him much. but hey, i understand, i do that all the time too.
well, good luck to him and how he gonna tell his girl.
as i was leaving school to meet ying hui to play pool, i happen to meet alex, benson, and shirley.
coincidently, they too were going for a pool game. and thats freaking sweet news.
along the way we met andrew, who decided to tag along.
so we all went to pavilion and i met ying hui there.
to my shock, i was actually handling my game considerably well!
i thought my skills had degraded quite abit since i entered poly.
maybe i was too...tense in the past about playing with my poly mates.
i beat shirley twice. hahahaaa. i laugh because she so wanna beat me but HOHO. sadly she beat me once at the end. eh -.-
wynner was there too.
it was damned fun. its been some time since i enjoyed myself like this. i found that...im no longer sorrowful about events happening. sure...its sad to me...but probrably...i no longer worry about it.
come what may.
other then that, i saw abby twice today. and both times i found myself accompanying her.
though we didnt talk much.
but its ok.
anyways,
yesterday, i met ying hui.
for those of you who have been following my blog, you may remember ying hui in one of my past month post. i think.
well, as predicted by fukun and me, his problems with his gf has come, and on the dot, after a month.
so he came to me to tell me his problem. even though i probrably couldnt help him much. but hey, i understand, i do that all the time too.
well, good luck to him and how he gonna tell his girl.
as i was leaving school to meet ying hui to play pool, i happen to meet alex, benson, and shirley.
coincidently, they too were going for a pool game. and thats freaking sweet news.
along the way we met andrew, who decided to tag along.
so we all went to pavilion and i met ying hui there.
to my shock, i was actually handling my game considerably well!
i thought my skills had degraded quite abit since i entered poly.
maybe i was too...tense in the past about playing with my poly mates.
i beat shirley twice. hahahaaa. i laugh because she so wanna beat me but HOHO. sadly she beat me once at the end. eh -.-
wynner was there too.
it was damned fun. its been some time since i enjoyed myself like this. i found that...im no longer sorrowful about events happening. sure...its sad to me...but probrably...i no longer worry about it.
come what may.
other then that, i saw abby twice today. and both times i found myself accompanying her.
though we didnt talk much.
but its ok.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Fear
today is the first time i had this certain fear concerning her.
what is this fear?
the fear that she might have feelings for some other guy.
in other words, the fear of losing her in THAT SENSE.
it came as a shock to me when i suddenly realised that fact.
and whats more after all these events.
do u noe what this means?
i think i do.
what is this fear?
the fear that she might have feelings for some other guy.
in other words, the fear of losing her in THAT SENSE.
it came as a shock to me when i suddenly realised that fact.
and whats more after all these events.
do u noe what this means?
i think i do.
Monday, November 21, 2005
Blind Rage
now.
lets see.
so she says she dont wanna be my friend anymore.
which ended in me utterly pissed.
why?
because she went back on her word that we would continue being friends.
WHY WOULDNT I HATE FOR THAT.
am i expected to just be alrite with that and as if its no big deal.
it is a big deal.
and im a human. im not exactly a saint.
so if i dont get pissed, i think somethings wrong with me.
lets see.
i changed my nick to include 'im glad i can hate u openly now' after we chatted.
yeah. pretty stupid move.
and then jia asked am i sure i hate her.
to which MADE ME THINK.
i dont HATE her. but still. at that moment...i was pissed at her.
pissed enough to not bother what i say anymore.
i mean. what she has done...im so mad at that. swearing and cursing CANNOT MEASURE HOW I FEEL about it.
but still. the truth is she is still MY FRIEND.
cos i honour her words and i agreed to be her friend till the end.
okok. sure she GOT HER REASONS. and ALL THAT.
but yeah, i have my reasons to be unhappy as well. respect that. or stfu.
do u noe the onli reason i write this blog now is all for that girl.
the onli reason im writing THIS ENTRY is so she can read it and NOE ME.
bottom line.
i was very pissed at her.
i couldnt take it.
i blew up.
i put the wrong thing in my nick in anger.
ur still MY friend.
as for the other way around, thats for u to decide now.
lets see.
so she says she dont wanna be my friend anymore.
which ended in me utterly pissed.
why?
because she went back on her word that we would continue being friends.
WHY WOULDNT I HATE FOR THAT.
am i expected to just be alrite with that and as if its no big deal.
it is a big deal.
and im a human. im not exactly a saint.
so if i dont get pissed, i think somethings wrong with me.
lets see.
i changed my nick to include 'im glad i can hate u openly now' after we chatted.
yeah. pretty stupid move.
and then jia asked am i sure i hate her.
to which MADE ME THINK.
i dont HATE her. but still. at that moment...i was pissed at her.
pissed enough to not bother what i say anymore.
i mean. what she has done...im so mad at that. swearing and cursing CANNOT MEASURE HOW I FEEL about it.
but still. the truth is she is still MY FRIEND.
cos i honour her words and i agreed to be her friend till the end.
okok. sure she GOT HER REASONS. and ALL THAT.
but yeah, i have my reasons to be unhappy as well. respect that. or stfu.
do u noe the onli reason i write this blog now is all for that girl.
the onli reason im writing THIS ENTRY is so she can read it and NOE ME.
bottom line.
i was very pissed at her.
i couldnt take it.
i blew up.
i put the wrong thing in my nick in anger.
ur still MY friend.
as for the other way around, thats for u to decide now.
Note
hi ex-friend.
u just threw away a friend. good or not, i dunno.
u feel alrite with that?
if u dont, then think about what u could lose if u didnt throw me away.
that must be worth it.
very worth it.
if not u wont be able to live with urself.
and thats sad.
your dear ex-friend,
Victor Goh
u just threw away a friend. good or not, i dunno.
u feel alrite with that?
if u dont, then think about what u could lose if u didnt throw me away.
that must be worth it.
very worth it.
if not u wont be able to live with urself.
and thats sad.
your dear ex-friend,
Victor Goh
Sunday, November 20, 2005
Prayer and Acceptance
today i went to church again, for the 2nd time after more then a year.
again, like last week, i asked for but one thing.
guidance for the both of us in our moment of turmoil.
with that, i have no doubts the path that follows is the will of the Lord.
whether i like it or not.
again, like last week, i asked for but one thing.
guidance for the both of us in our moment of turmoil.
with that, i have no doubts the path that follows is the will of the Lord.
whether i like it or not.
Talk
as i read her post, i could feel my breath getting heavier and heavier. i could feel my chest muscles contracting. my hands got cold.
i cant stop thinking either.
and what makes u think its as if i think ONLI OF MYSELF.
did i say ur not sad, pissed, confused, disapointed. did i say its onli me feeling that way?
if u can. then leave it.
as u always say.
'up to u loh'. oh yeah. dont forget the wink. 0.-
the best way probrably to the normal human, is to leave it. as she types: 'ignore and live as per normal.'
however. i feel it is not the best way. probrably cos im not the typical human.
i have never left things...unsettled, between my friends.
thats rite.
ur still my friend.
wasnt it u who told me to never stop being your friend? UNLESS UVE FORGOTTEN.
sure...we have our ISSUES...and PROBS...but does that mean ur not gonna be friends anymore?
we need to talk.
and by talking, i dont mean asking me to go the the library and waiting for a conversation. (so kill me)
i mean sitting down, and DISCUSSING our problems face to face. asking me to the library wasnt a good idea, cos u didnt ask me to talk. u asked me to accompany u. if u dont noe the (big and yet subtle) difference, i dunno how to explain it to u.
enough about the library.
though using our blogs as a way to transmit our feelings to each other at a given point of time is useful, i would think it doesnt solve things much. (and personally i think its abit tiring)
i feel like saying 'if u are still adamant on leaving things as they then its fine'
but ya noe what.
its NOT FINE to me. so i cant say that.
i cant stop thinking either.
and what makes u think its as if i think ONLI OF MYSELF.
did i say ur not sad, pissed, confused, disapointed. did i say its onli me feeling that way?
if u can. then leave it.
as u always say.
'up to u loh'. oh yeah. dont forget the wink. 0.-
the best way probrably to the normal human, is to leave it. as she types: 'ignore and live as per normal.'
however. i feel it is not the best way. probrably cos im not the typical human.
i have never left things...unsettled, between my friends.
thats rite.
ur still my friend.
wasnt it u who told me to never stop being your friend? UNLESS UVE FORGOTTEN.
sure...we have our ISSUES...and PROBS...but does that mean ur not gonna be friends anymore?
we need to talk.
and by talking, i dont mean asking me to go the the library and waiting for a conversation. (so kill me)
i mean sitting down, and DISCUSSING our problems face to face. asking me to the library wasnt a good idea, cos u didnt ask me to talk. u asked me to accompany u. if u dont noe the (big and yet subtle) difference, i dunno how to explain it to u.
enough about the library.
though using our blogs as a way to transmit our feelings to each other at a given point of time is useful, i would think it doesnt solve things much. (and personally i think its abit tiring)
i feel like saying 'if u are still adamant on leaving things as they then its fine'
but ya noe what.
its NOT FINE to me. so i cant say that.
Friday, November 18, 2005
5 random things
due to abby writing my name in her blog, as to say she wants me to do this activity on my blog too, i have decided to continue this trend.
not cos she wants me to.
cos i respect her as a friend.
1.
i take pride in myself and who i am. i dont hate myself in any way. i love and respect myself. but im not self obsessed either.
2.
i have many friends i dont give 2 nuts about. ALOT. but theres not one of them i would turn away if he/she is a friend in need. but still. i dont love these friends much.
3.
i hate going out with people i dont care/know/bother about.
4.
i like simplicity. but i dont like simple minded people. theres a big diff. and i realli want a simple life away from all this city and speed.
5.
i love swords. and martial arts.
now. im supposed to write 5 people who i want to do this activity too.
but i wont.
not cos she wants me to.
cos i respect her as a friend.
1.
i take pride in myself and who i am. i dont hate myself in any way. i love and respect myself. but im not self obsessed either.
2.
i have many friends i dont give 2 nuts about. ALOT. but theres not one of them i would turn away if he/she is a friend in need. but still. i dont love these friends much.
3.
i hate going out with people i dont care/know/bother about.
4.
i like simplicity. but i dont like simple minded people. theres a big diff. and i realli want a simple life away from all this city and speed.
5.
i love swords. and martial arts.
now. im supposed to write 5 people who i want to do this activity too.
but i wont.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Monday, November 14, 2005
Surreal
haha!
i just turned on the radio.
and the words i heard
'u got stuck in a moment and ya cant get out of it.'
oh how true my Lord.
haha.
i find im relating more and more things in life to God.
maybe thats a good thing. i mean...can it be bad?
the sermon i attended told a story of not being ashamed of ur faith.
hmm...
it shows ur not afraid. it shows ur loyal.
thats something all humans should be yeah? not onli those acting under religion.
hmm...ok
i made it through today. wow. what a day.
everyday seems that faithful friday has been like a wild adventure.
it seems almost like a dream.
why?
because i never expected myself to ever end up like this.
and in so short a time.
its almost unbelieveable. considering the tame life i often expect to lead.
so anyways.
i realise i became so blind.
geez.
ok. the truth is, i kinda knew i was gonna be blinded. but hell. i didnt care!
shows how blinded i was.
the thing i originally wanted, was just to be there for her.
that alone was enough!
but then, the more she wanted to accept her fate, the less i wanted to accept it as well.
and so all the more i wanted to go further then my (initially) intended actions.
after all the stuff we went through, and after i probrably broke my limit yesterday (side note: so fast? am i weak or was it THAT bad), and thus losing my confidance and cool (OH THE SHAME), i was reminded of how things should be cos of her.
yeah. cos of her! (i am shamed!!! haha)
maybe she doesnt realise it. but she did. she woke me up my my pitiful state. thank goodness.
and um...
let me make it clear
IM GLAD SHE TOLD ME.
I DO NOT REGRET FEELING THIS PAIN.
I DO NOT REGRET FINDING OUT THE TRUTH.
HER KEEPING HER FEELINGS WOULD HAVE HURT ME MORE.
yeah. ok...if she never told me, i wouldnt noe...BUT if i were to die and find out, i would be very very VERY upset.
and um...though theres no way i can prove it, i DO understand how u feel.
i bet it must have been all the more confusing for u.
and i never doubted that. we were both in pain.
but maybe i seemed as if i didnt realise.
cos i was just being a jack ass.
im sorry. i think its part of me being a guy.
and um...hey.
friends can have feelings for each other rite?
HA.
i just turned on the radio.
and the words i heard
'u got stuck in a moment and ya cant get out of it.'
oh how true my Lord.
haha.
i find im relating more and more things in life to God.
maybe thats a good thing. i mean...can it be bad?
the sermon i attended told a story of not being ashamed of ur faith.
hmm...
it shows ur not afraid. it shows ur loyal.
thats something all humans should be yeah? not onli those acting under religion.
hmm...ok
i made it through today. wow. what a day.
everyday seems that faithful friday has been like a wild adventure.
it seems almost like a dream.
why?
because i never expected myself to ever end up like this.
and in so short a time.
its almost unbelieveable. considering the tame life i often expect to lead.
so anyways.
i realise i became so blind.
geez.
ok. the truth is, i kinda knew i was gonna be blinded. but hell. i didnt care!
shows how blinded i was.
the thing i originally wanted, was just to be there for her.
that alone was enough!
but then, the more she wanted to accept her fate, the less i wanted to accept it as well.
and so all the more i wanted to go further then my (initially) intended actions.
after all the stuff we went through, and after i probrably broke my limit yesterday (side note: so fast? am i weak or was it THAT bad), and thus losing my confidance and cool (OH THE SHAME), i was reminded of how things should be cos of her.
yeah. cos of her! (i am shamed!!! haha)
maybe she doesnt realise it. but she did. she woke me up my my pitiful state. thank goodness.
and um...
let me make it clear
IM GLAD SHE TOLD ME.
I DO NOT REGRET FEELING THIS PAIN.
I DO NOT REGRET FINDING OUT THE TRUTH.
HER KEEPING HER FEELINGS WOULD HAVE HURT ME MORE.
yeah. ok...if she never told me, i wouldnt noe...BUT if i were to die and find out, i would be very very VERY upset.
and um...though theres no way i can prove it, i DO understand how u feel.
i bet it must have been all the more confusing for u.
and i never doubted that. we were both in pain.
but maybe i seemed as if i didnt realise.
cos i was just being a jack ass.
im sorry. i think its part of me being a guy.
and um...hey.
friends can have feelings for each other rite?
HA.
Sunday, November 13, 2005
Tears
today at about 11pm.
is the first time i cried so hard probrably since i was a baby.
i never cried so much as tonite.
not even when i broke my leg in 3 places.
not even during my eye surgery during pri school.
i never cried cos of Ching Ling.
i cried tears of joy cos of Xi Xiang. but my eyes were just watery.
i never cried cos of Vannessa.
i did cry tears cos of Jovin. but it was just a little.
no tears flowed before tonite.
they onli surfaced...never flowing.
ive never been so hurt before. never.
the tears just flowed.
on my bed, and i just cant control it.
the tears just go and they flows down to my ears.
i get up and they go over my cheeks. wiping it off doesnt help.
thinking about it more...i cant stop crying...
even now as my fingers move across the keyboard.
this is how much i love you.
is the first time i cried so hard probrably since i was a baby.
i never cried so much as tonite.
not even when i broke my leg in 3 places.
not even during my eye surgery during pri school.
i never cried cos of Ching Ling.
i cried tears of joy cos of Xi Xiang. but my eyes were just watery.
i never cried cos of Vannessa.
i did cry tears cos of Jovin. but it was just a little.
no tears flowed before tonite.
they onli surfaced...never flowing.
ive never been so hurt before. never.
the tears just flowed.
on my bed, and i just cant control it.
the tears just go and they flows down to my ears.
i get up and they go over my cheeks. wiping it off doesnt help.
thinking about it more...i cant stop crying...
even now as my fingers move across the keyboard.
this is how much i love you.
Guidance
i need a break from this bullshit.
oh btw. i went to church today. after more then an year long absence.
just so u noe, the church i go to is the Church Of The Holy Trinity.
so. i went for mass today.
and i listened to the sermon.
ok. its was quite interesting. cos it concerned me somewhat. it concerns 'laid back catholics'. in other words, catholics who dont put much affort in thier faith. yeap.
i wont go into that.
the main thing is, it was the first time i prayed i a long time as well.
well, its the first time i prayed in church for a long long time ya noe? theres a difference when ur at home praying then when ur in church praying.
cos in church, i remember what im praying about cos its realli important.
the thing i prayed for, was for God to guide her and me through this ordeal.
to correct me if im doing the wrong thing. to correct her if shes doing the wrong thing. cos i dont noe who is rite and who is wrong. even if i knew, it wouldnt help.
onli God could help me then.
GUIDE US. thats what i asked for. simple.
but today. for some reason, im damn moody cos of her.
its small things ya noe...small things gather. over time it gets so overwhelming u just wanna blow up.
seriously. i began thinking to myself. why didnt i just give her up after that first incident? i knew she was too different. and YET. somehow i still ended up here.
ying hui would have made the right choice after all. ying hui was rite after all. im too fucking nice. im too fucking forgiving.
somehow i noe...even after this i wont forget anything about her. damn. this is me.
i found myself sitting down and wondering:
is this how God wishes to guide me now? is this the way God wants to lead me?
does anyone understand what im thinking and feeling now?
if u do, tell me. i noe some close friends of mine have been responding to my situation. to these people, i thank u for your attention and audience.
oh btw. i went to church today. after more then an year long absence.
just so u noe, the church i go to is the Church Of The Holy Trinity.
so. i went for mass today.
and i listened to the sermon.
ok. its was quite interesting. cos it concerned me somewhat. it concerns 'laid back catholics'. in other words, catholics who dont put much affort in thier faith. yeap.
i wont go into that.
the main thing is, it was the first time i prayed i a long time as well.
well, its the first time i prayed in church for a long long time ya noe? theres a difference when ur at home praying then when ur in church praying.
cos in church, i remember what im praying about cos its realli important.
the thing i prayed for, was for God to guide her and me through this ordeal.
to correct me if im doing the wrong thing. to correct her if shes doing the wrong thing. cos i dont noe who is rite and who is wrong. even if i knew, it wouldnt help.
onli God could help me then.
GUIDE US. thats what i asked for. simple.
but today. for some reason, im damn moody cos of her.
its small things ya noe...small things gather. over time it gets so overwhelming u just wanna blow up.
seriously. i began thinking to myself. why didnt i just give her up after that first incident? i knew she was too different. and YET. somehow i still ended up here.
ying hui would have made the right choice after all. ying hui was rite after all. im too fucking nice. im too fucking forgiving.
somehow i noe...even after this i wont forget anything about her. damn. this is me.
i found myself sitting down and wondering:
is this how God wishes to guide me now? is this the way God wants to lead me?
does anyone understand what im thinking and feeling now?
if u do, tell me. i noe some close friends of mine have been responding to my situation. to these people, i thank u for your attention and audience.
My Love
i feel so serious about her.
so. serious.
this is the first time i realli feel...id be willing to go all the way.
but then again. im just one human.
will the day come when i decide to realli give it up?
ill never noe.
but ill never give up witout trying.
and maybe thats why u love me too.
we believe in the same God...but how come we our beliefs can be so different?!
this is the first time in a long time i feel like onli God can help me now.
i decided some time ago...i wouldnt seek help from God just for small things, or things i could at least control a little.
so it led to me barely praying to God for assistance.
but this...i can do nothing about it. nothing at all. except to love her.
and somehow thats not enough.
helplessly im hoping for salvation.
i love u. maybe forever, maybe not.
but i noe, ill love u till the last, till i can no longer do so.
and then ull noe. i always loved u.
and God will noe it too.
so. serious.
this is the first time i realli feel...id be willing to go all the way.
but then again. im just one human.
will the day come when i decide to realli give it up?
ill never noe.
but ill never give up witout trying.
and maybe thats why u love me too.
we believe in the same God...but how come we our beliefs can be so different?!
this is the first time in a long time i feel like onli God can help me now.
i decided some time ago...i wouldnt seek help from God just for small things, or things i could at least control a little.
so it led to me barely praying to God for assistance.
but this...i can do nothing about it. nothing at all. except to love her.
and somehow thats not enough.
helplessly im hoping for salvation.
i love u. maybe forever, maybe not.
but i noe, ill love u till the last, till i can no longer do so.
and then ull noe. i always loved u.
and God will noe it too.
Saturday, November 12, 2005
My Resolve
theres a sudden and drastic turn of events now...
ill just leave...some words to myself...and to whoever it may concern...
i realli have strong feelings for you. realli. i do.
if i didnt have strong feelings before. i do now. after all my hardship and patience, i feel like tonight was the time it all paid off.
but no sooner had i thought my reward was given to me, i realised...it was not meant as a reward. no...
it was not a reward.
maybe...it was a reminder from God...
to remind me of my faith.
like...i thought i had it in my grasp. but it was taken away the next moment.
WHY!
because of religion.
because of God.
now i feel this...yes...i dont deserve her...not yet...ive not proven my worth and ive not been faithful to my church. im a sinner. of course i dont deserve this.
this was set like this...so that i would have to EARN my love.
because of this, i feel as if shes the one.
does anyone understand what i mean?
i feel shes the one, simply because of this obstacle. how is it that its so coincidental and sudden, all these events transpire before my eyes witout me able to control anything!
the 'reward' was shown to me. and then it was taken. as a reminder of what i would get, and what i would need to work for. do u SEE IT?!
i simply CANNOT let this go.
why?!
because i can not bring myself to leave her that way.
if she is to continue that path, HOW SAD IT WOULD BE.
it brings me great sorrow THINKING about it. how can i just let it go WHILE SHE SUFFERS.
perhaps its time for me to go back with God.
ill just leave...some words to myself...and to whoever it may concern...
i realli have strong feelings for you. realli. i do.
if i didnt have strong feelings before. i do now. after all my hardship and patience, i feel like tonight was the time it all paid off.
but no sooner had i thought my reward was given to me, i realised...it was not meant as a reward. no...
it was not a reward.
maybe...it was a reminder from God...
to remind me of my faith.
like...i thought i had it in my grasp. but it was taken away the next moment.
WHY!
because of religion.
because of God.
now i feel this...yes...i dont deserve her...not yet...ive not proven my worth and ive not been faithful to my church. im a sinner. of course i dont deserve this.
this was set like this...so that i would have to EARN my love.
because of this, i feel as if shes the one.
does anyone understand what i mean?
i feel shes the one, simply because of this obstacle. how is it that its so coincidental and sudden, all these events transpire before my eyes witout me able to control anything!
the 'reward' was shown to me. and then it was taken. as a reminder of what i would get, and what i would need to work for. do u SEE IT?!
i simply CANNOT let this go.
why?!
because i can not bring myself to leave her that way.
if she is to continue that path, HOW SAD IT WOULD BE.
it brings me great sorrow THINKING about it. how can i just let it go WHILE SHE SUFFERS.
perhaps its time for me to go back with God.
FLIPPIN' MAD
WOOOOOOO
i feel so freakin HIGH! though i was feeling ABOSUTELY NUTZ just 30 min ago IM STILL FLYING.
I AM SOOOO HIGH!
IM MAD!
IM CRAZY!
XD XD XD XD XD
i feel so freakin HIGH! though i was feeling ABOSUTELY NUTZ just 30 min ago IM STILL FLYING.
I AM SOOOO HIGH!
IM MAD!
IM CRAZY!
XD XD XD XD XD
Friday, November 11, 2005
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Culture and Expression
today, i had the elective class, Culture and Expression
it was very interesting.
but theres 2 things i hate though.
1.
the VSC irritants. (note: im not generalizing here. im just talking about CERTAIN organic beings belonging to the fun course VSC.)
2.
the fat irritating noisy moron sitting 4 spaces away to my left. i cant shake off the feeling he is in VSC. must resist.
damn. if i cant stand something in a class, ESP IN POLY, its childish morons who dont noe when is the limit.
SHUT UP FOOLS.
maybe im just too boring. but hoho. ME.
it was very interesting.
but theres 2 things i hate though.
1.
the VSC irritants. (note: im not generalizing here. im just talking about CERTAIN organic beings belonging to the fun course VSC.)
2.
the fat irritating noisy moron sitting 4 spaces away to my left. i cant shake off the feeling he is in VSC. must resist.
damn. if i cant stand something in a class, ESP IN POLY, its childish morons who dont noe when is the limit.
SHUT UP FOOLS.
maybe im just too boring. but hoho. ME.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Sweet Randoms
for this post, i have no real topic.
as titled.
sweet randoms.
(i would like to mention. in this entry, when i mention noisy people...i mean the type that simply wont shut up and loves yakking. and when i mention silent people, i dont mean dumb people. i mean, people who talk moderately onli around CERTAIN people.)
ever noticed evil and live are the exact opposite spelling
santa and satan are is just one letter switched
Kill one man and you are a murderer.
Kill millions and you are a conqueror.
Kill everyone and you are God.
ever heard of it?
think about it.
noisy people tend to be stupid people.
people who make noise tend to be those who cause trouble.
im sure uve seen it.
the noisy bunch in class?
the bunch who gossip alot?
ever noticed those are the people who tend to turn to have...not so good ways of doing things? while the quiet people are those who would be less likely to do sinful things.
noisy people like attention.
people who like attention also tend to be more...instultive, and are more likely to put down others.
so what am i saying?
avoid noisy people. unless...ur noisy. HA.
just kidding. not.
the good will triumph in the end.
is this true?
joel (my sec school mate) and me discussed this.
joel bases quite alot of his 'facts' on the holiness of the Lord.
well, so i asked him, what if we leave religion and God out of this.
so. joel says.
evil people dont have the unity that good people have, thus they would be less likely to coordinate themselves for a true fight against good.
hmm...i never realli thought of that. haha.
so i says.
good people have qualities that would prove to be more 'powerful' then those of evil.
what are those qualities, and why?
qualities like...perseverence, tolerance, and whatever.
well now. the thing is. evil people tend to have weaker character. sure, they may be ruthless and cunning. but in the END. the good guys should win because thier natural innate characters will leave them in a more...advantageous position.
oh yeah.
evil people tend to have more fear in thier hearts and are more likely to RUN when encountered with fear or pain.
its true =)
know the similarity of a fighter and a dancer?
if a person were to resort to ruthless and merciless means to defeat an enemy, but for the GREATER GOOD of things, is he considered...good? or...evil?
i would like some feedback about this particular thought...
difference between 'anti social' and 'shy'.
silent people are usually the most calm.
silent people are the ones who noe the most things.
silent people are the ones who wont forget.
silent people tend to be wiser.
in a bad situation, the wise always appear calm, but are also the ones thinking most.
lets see...how many times have u see a noisy person give a false alarm(e.g. OMG I LOST MY PHONE. *5 min later* oops its in my pocket). and how many times has a more quiet person done the same?
i realise this post focuses alot of good and evil...and noisy or silent people.
why?
because obviously, these 2 things have a great impact on me.
cos.
evil people are everywhere.
noisy poeople are everywhere.
i noticed the 2 are usually the same group of people.
but still, this entry isnt totally about that =)
the fine line between EVIL and REALISTIC.
in truth, both these groups are not GOOD people.
but realistic is not EVIL as well.
realistic is when u realise the harsh reality of this world and DEAL WITH IT.
ignorance is when u dont accept reality.
evil is when u hate reality and want it all to be destroyed.
good is when u see reality and want to MAKE IT BETTER FOR EVERYONE.
thats how i see it.
now i think about it...this is my 'evolution' starting from last year.
sec 4.
the good boy with a low profile. usally quiet, doesnt talk much.
post o lvl.
the good boy with a low profile. still same.
poly orienation period.
realism starts to get me abit...
post poly orientation period.
NOISY. i have been influenced by all the nonsense.
poly semester 1.
REALISM smacks me in the balls. i start being that way. EVIL starts to infest me. i slowly realise my flaw and remember how i used to be. i start getting more quiet again.
RECENT.
still realistic. constantly trying my best to be GOOD again. talks as little as i used to.
yeah...it sounds lame...but maybe u would understand me.
i will probrably write more entries like this. not too often though, or people might stone me to death.
as titled.
sweet randoms.
(i would like to mention. in this entry, when i mention noisy people...i mean the type that simply wont shut up and loves yakking. and when i mention silent people, i dont mean dumb people. i mean, people who talk moderately onli around CERTAIN people.)
ever noticed evil and live are the exact opposite spelling
santa and satan are is just one letter switched
Kill one man and you are a murderer.
Kill millions and you are a conqueror.
Kill everyone and you are God.
ever heard of it?
think about it.
noisy people tend to be stupid people.
people who make noise tend to be those who cause trouble.
im sure uve seen it.
the noisy bunch in class?
the bunch who gossip alot?
ever noticed those are the people who tend to turn to have...not so good ways of doing things? while the quiet people are those who would be less likely to do sinful things.
noisy people like attention.
people who like attention also tend to be more...instultive, and are more likely to put down others.
so what am i saying?
avoid noisy people. unless...ur noisy. HA.
just kidding. not.
the good will triumph in the end.
is this true?
joel (my sec school mate) and me discussed this.
joel bases quite alot of his 'facts' on the holiness of the Lord.
well, so i asked him, what if we leave religion and God out of this.
so. joel says.
evil people dont have the unity that good people have, thus they would be less likely to coordinate themselves for a true fight against good.
hmm...i never realli thought of that. haha.
so i says.
good people have qualities that would prove to be more 'powerful' then those of evil.
what are those qualities, and why?
qualities like...perseverence, tolerance, and whatever.
well now. the thing is. evil people tend to have weaker character. sure, they may be ruthless and cunning. but in the END. the good guys should win because thier natural innate characters will leave them in a more...advantageous position.
oh yeah.
evil people tend to have more fear in thier hearts and are more likely to RUN when encountered with fear or pain.
its true =)
know the similarity of a fighter and a dancer?
if a person were to resort to ruthless and merciless means to defeat an enemy, but for the GREATER GOOD of things, is he considered...good? or...evil?
i would like some feedback about this particular thought...
difference between 'anti social' and 'shy'.
silent people are usually the most calm.
silent people are the ones who noe the most things.
silent people are the ones who wont forget.
silent people tend to be wiser.
in a bad situation, the wise always appear calm, but are also the ones thinking most.
lets see...how many times have u see a noisy person give a false alarm(e.g. OMG I LOST MY PHONE. *5 min later* oops its in my pocket). and how many times has a more quiet person done the same?
i realise this post focuses alot of good and evil...and noisy or silent people.
why?
because obviously, these 2 things have a great impact on me.
cos.
evil people are everywhere.
noisy poeople are everywhere.
i noticed the 2 are usually the same group of people.
but still, this entry isnt totally about that =)
the fine line between EVIL and REALISTIC.
in truth, both these groups are not GOOD people.
but realistic is not EVIL as well.
realistic is when u realise the harsh reality of this world and DEAL WITH IT.
ignorance is when u dont accept reality.
evil is when u hate reality and want it all to be destroyed.
good is when u see reality and want to MAKE IT BETTER FOR EVERYONE.
thats how i see it.
now i think about it...this is my 'evolution' starting from last year.
sec 4.
the good boy with a low profile. usally quiet, doesnt talk much.
post o lvl.
the good boy with a low profile. still same.
poly orienation period.
realism starts to get me abit...
post poly orientation period.
NOISY. i have been influenced by all the nonsense.
poly semester 1.
REALISM smacks me in the balls. i start being that way. EVIL starts to infest me. i slowly realise my flaw and remember how i used to be. i start getting more quiet again.
RECENT.
still realistic. constantly trying my best to be GOOD again. talks as little as i used to.
yeah...it sounds lame...but maybe u would understand me.
i will probrably write more entries like this. not too often though, or people might stone me to death.
Monday, November 07, 2005
1st day of nov semester
school today. was fagging. boring.
DAMNED. BORING.
id say its cos of the lecturer. (tha same guy who taught the most boring lesson in semester 1)
i even SLEPT during the lecture.
that shows how flipping boring it was.
and its every monday. GAH!!!!
what a way to spend every monday.
i saw doreen today. FINALLY.
i missed her alot.
her hair has changed.
no longer standing up at the back.
she looks...different now...
somehow, more feminine.
but shes still same as ever! well...other then CERTAIN STUFF. hahaha.
wish her all the best.
she says she will keep me updated.
and i too will keep her updated.
what a nice person.
i left the school early.
cos the rest wanna go watch a movie.
like. what the hell.
i have no mood. esp after the super boring lesson.
they are still the wild people anyways. best at enjoying themselves and wasting time. hoho. well whats important is they have fun anyways.
met qian ning and lindee at the bustop by coincidence.
qian ning...looks different. no longer the goody gal she looked like. (not that she was EVER a goody gal...hehe)
as for lindee...oh she still looks the same. the same quite attractive young gal. ha. her hair colour has changed though.
i apparently seemed the blur guy with them. just cos i keep saying 'huh'. well...cant blame me!!! qian nings voice is too 'squeaky' and i was listening to my MP3. qian ning found it abit irritating. lindee seemed amused probrably cos i seem pretty clownish at these times -.-
its unintentional. geez.
then uh...i got off the bus...managed to see some sec school familiers.
damn...they still seem as ummature and stupid as ever! unbelievable.
though i did meet one of my 'respected juniors'.
he too, hasnt changed. still the smart lad. still the good boy. not like those others maggots i saw. heh.
then i got home.
DAMNED. BORING.
id say its cos of the lecturer. (tha same guy who taught the most boring lesson in semester 1)
i even SLEPT during the lecture.
that shows how flipping boring it was.
and its every monday. GAH!!!!
what a way to spend every monday.
i saw doreen today. FINALLY.
i missed her alot.
her hair has changed.
no longer standing up at the back.
she looks...different now...
somehow, more feminine.
but shes still same as ever! well...other then CERTAIN STUFF. hahaha.
wish her all the best.
she says she will keep me updated.
and i too will keep her updated.
what a nice person.
i left the school early.
cos the rest wanna go watch a movie.
like. what the hell.
i have no mood. esp after the super boring lesson.
they are still the wild people anyways. best at enjoying themselves and wasting time. hoho. well whats important is they have fun anyways.
met qian ning and lindee at the bustop by coincidence.
qian ning...looks different. no longer the goody gal she looked like. (not that she was EVER a goody gal...hehe)
as for lindee...oh she still looks the same. the same quite attractive young gal. ha. her hair colour has changed though.
i apparently seemed the blur guy with them. just cos i keep saying 'huh'. well...cant blame me!!! qian nings voice is too 'squeaky' and i was listening to my MP3. qian ning found it abit irritating. lindee seemed amused probrably cos i seem pretty clownish at these times -.-
its unintentional. geez.
then uh...i got off the bus...managed to see some sec school familiers.
damn...they still seem as ummature and stupid as ever! unbelievable.
though i did meet one of my 'respected juniors'.
he too, hasnt changed. still the smart lad. still the good boy. not like those others maggots i saw. heh.
then i got home.
Friday, November 04, 2005
Science Centre
On the 3rd of november, i went to the Science Centre, with Abby, Theresa, and Nicholas (Theresa's bro)
it was fun.
more fun then anytime i went before.
probrably because i forgot how fun such a place is. and also because i had to oppurtunity to rediscovered the place with my fine friends.
did i mention it was fun?
abby took some pics.
my fav
we look damn good dont we? im in the bhb mood pardon me.
it was also the first time i ate the mysterious food item called SPACE ICE CREAM.
yes people.
first time.
to those who havent eaten it, a word of advice.
dont bite or chew it.
just let it melt.
or ull regret it when u finish. XD
oh yeah. it costs (a ridiculous price of) S$3.50
hmm, as usual i dont give much details eh?
all u people need to noe is. i had fun =)
thats what ur here to noe rite? hehe
it was fun.
more fun then anytime i went before.
probrably because i forgot how fun such a place is. and also because i had to oppurtunity to rediscovered the place with my fine friends.
did i mention it was fun?
abby took some pics.
my fav
we look damn good dont we? im in the bhb mood pardon me.
it was also the first time i ate the mysterious food item called SPACE ICE CREAM.
yes people.
first time.
to those who havent eaten it, a word of advice.
dont bite or chew it.
just let it melt.
or ull regret it when u finish. XD
oh yeah. it costs (a ridiculous price of) S$3.50
hmm, as usual i dont give much details eh?
all u people need to noe is. i had fun =)
thats what ur here to noe rite? hehe
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