Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Back
Hi all, I'm back.
The trip was good and bad. But i dont feel like typing the whole thing out. Its really good...and bad.
In some ways I regret going actually.
I actually feel spiritually weaker then before I left.
I dunno what to say, and not just literally. In my heart, I feel an incapablity to express and to dig deeper into my depths. Ive felt like this since coming back back. It just feels like the past 2 weeks have made me...distant. To myself even.
I can barely hear my heart speak to me. Suddenly I realise. It was always God that spoke to me through my heart. It feels like i have a wall around me, like I just dont want to hear.
I feel like running away, and at the same time I feel like rushing forward very fast.
I feel numb and at the same time I feel aware.
I feel confused and at the same time I am sure of my duties.
I need to get back to how I was.
The trip was good and bad. But i dont feel like typing the whole thing out. Its really good...and bad.
In some ways I regret going actually.
I actually feel spiritually weaker then before I left.
I dunno what to say, and not just literally. In my heart, I feel an incapablity to express and to dig deeper into my depths. Ive felt like this since coming back back. It just feels like the past 2 weeks have made me...distant. To myself even.
I can barely hear my heart speak to me. Suddenly I realise. It was always God that spoke to me through my heart. It feels like i have a wall around me, like I just dont want to hear.
I feel like running away, and at the same time I feel like rushing forward very fast.
I feel numb and at the same time I feel aware.
I feel confused and at the same time I am sure of my duties.
I need to get back to how I was.
Labels:
Emotions
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